whe you wish.....

upon a boy.

My loveliest friend in the whole. wide. world. has a brother.
this brother is cute, funny, adorable and a great kisser.
We can't tell anyone what we get up to and I don't even know what we are to be honest [friends with benefits? dating? whores? blatant, blatant whores?]
we haven't 'done it' or anything. we sneak away at night and hold hands and watch movies.
watching movies with him is amazing because I can kiss him whenever it get's boring.
holding hands is one of the most beautiful things in the world.
He's sitting beside me now on his lap top watching something.
Idon't think he likes me as much as I like him.
which is bad.
because I have a boyfriend.

I have a boyfriend.....
shit, I have a boyfriend
So on the bad person scale this puts me about about 100 from one to ten.
I don't love my boyfriend, we don't have sex,we hardly ever see each other and I really don't think we are in love.
well....I'm not in love and hell,I miss being in love.
why am I with my boyfriend?
I don't want to be alone my friends brother lives like two hours away and can;t see him weeks at a time..

we have plans.
to run away.
to Canada.
I don't wanna fall for this boy but I can feel it happening.

And now we have....

SECRET PEOPLE BUSINESS

So I have decided to start yet another blog, suprise!
to record, make sense of and rant about the things that go on.

where should I start?
The Fil I'm Costuming? The affair? My partner? The night we called the police in on our fighting flatmates. I dunno.
maybe there are some things I should keep to myself.
I'll talk to you tonight